homemade MRE

HOMEMADE MRE
I included a guest article today. When you are done here keep scrolling down. I just now noticed that Google offers blog publishers a new feature, the blog search. You'll notice it up in the upper right corner. It is pretty cool. I tried "SKS" and got at least five articles where it was mentioned. So, try whatever interests you and reread all my wisdom. This is a really nice feature since I can't remember what I wrote about, or when. At least for now, but no promises when, I'm abandoning my fiction page. Sorry, it just wasn't motivating me anymore. As a better than nothing substitute I started a film review page at www.bisonfilms.blogspot.com . To get you to actually visit it ( unlike the last one two years back ) I'm going to include one post-apocalypse review each week. You won't know which day, though, so you will have to keep going back and read reviews of regular films ( whatever I feel like getting at the library or Redbox ). Insert Doctor Evil diabolical laugh.
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I have more food stocked up than I can shake a stick at. Where did that phrase come from? Shake a stick at. Is it me, or does that make no sense? What I don't have much of is foods that don't require cooking or water to clean with. I can already see you in the back of the class, sitting in the corner with your dunce cap on, wildly waving your hand, begging to answer and hoping to redeem yourself. I don't even need to hear what you have to say to know you suck. No, the answer is not MRE's. Oh, they taste good enough as long as you stay away from certain entrees like Wild Duck Ass On Rice With Curry Sauce ( you know I'm kidding, but don't think some PC idiot on the planning board didn't already consider some nasty crap like that so they could appease some strange ethnic sub-group by serving cheeseburger and fries guys swill they never heard of and never considered eating ). They are filling enough. And nicely compact. I've eating ten year old packs that tasted fine, they just had a very strange color to the peanut butter. Of course, I also ate C-rats from Korea while in boot camp. If it's one thing everyone can agree on with military rations, it's that they taste just as bad one day after packaging as fifty years later.
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No, the only problem with MRE's is that they cost too damn much. No problem if you are buying a bug out bags worth. Just three days or so. But when you start a serious stockpile they add up too quick. As I keep harping on, one days MRE or one months wheat cost the same. Each MRE is six dollars or so. Even at five bucks it is too much. I own exactly two MRE's. And I didn't even pay for it. While trash picking one fine day I came across a lot of military discards. The newer Beretta holster. An Arctic coat. Duffel bags. And two MRE's. They looked just fine, didn't feel like air got in. Would I have them if I had to pay? More than likely no. But I need something besides two days, just in case. I'm sure there will be plenty of opportunities to need to eat with no cooking or cleaning come the collapse. So, what else could I stock that was cheap, compact, and full of calories? It doesn't need to be a four course meal. Or even traditional. Just compact calories.
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I think what started me on pondering this was looking at the calories on a bottle of corn syrup ( I don't know if someone else mentioned this before- if they did it was buried in my subconscious ). One pound bottle is two thousand calories. God knows why you would want to suck on a bottle of Karo syrup all day, but you must admit it is a compact unit for rations. A bag of chocolate chips, 12 ounces, is about two thousand. A pound of raisins is 1500. As is a box of graham crackers. As is a pound of sweetened condensed milk. The best bet seems to be a small jar of peanut butter at three thousand calories. I know a loyal minion mentioned PB before, but at the time we were talking about the cheapest calories. It didn't work there, but it sure works for non-cooking calories. And a jar is still under two bucks at Wally World. Although who knows how long that will last. Those bastards are pissing me off more and more lately. I used to be able to just shop Wal-Mart. Now I have to shop them, Family Dollar and the dollar store because China-Marts prices are no longer uniformly the lowest. And I stuck up for them all these years. You know what they did now? One week I get a box of instant mashed potatoes, the two pack type, for eighty eight cents. The next week they are $1.08 for the same. Oh, I saw red. Shades of the Pringle Price Hike. Even my once faithful family from Arkansas is turning on me ( speaking of turning, I notice Creekmore now has over twice my readers. I still love him, but I think some are fair weather minions ).
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Notice, I'm not concerned too much with variety here. Just compact, cheap, non-cook rations. It may not be a great idea to get all your calories from sugar. I don't mean for that to be your two week long diet. I'd stock a lot of PB, a little chocolate. And I'm sure some of you will have much better suggestions. Just keep it cheap and compact with no need to process or cook. Top Ramen is still cheap, but you need half a case to get the needed calories which is not compact ( yes, you can easily eat Ramen raw ).
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