homeless test

HOMELESS TEST
The Three Day Test is one of those things we as preppers are supposed to do to test our readiness. You turn off the power for an extended weekend and find out all the stuff you are doing wrong and what areas need improving. I just saw a TV commercial for a new series about eight houses in a neighborhood being cut off from the outside world, no power or Web or TV. I have no idea what they are going to do. I imagine it is going to be like Big Brother, hot young twenty somethings with impossibly fit bodies all acting like sluts. Apparently the viewing audience doesn't get enough of being constantly in rut themselves. But this time they must be doing all that by candlelight. Of course, this kind of reminds me of that short lived jerk off about the town being populated just by kids. Except for all the adult TV crew of course. So here we have no electricity, but all the cameras are in operation. One long extension cord? Anyway, I don't know if the test is going mainstream but at least perhaps the idea has.
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I don't need to do this test myself, being off grid. You all laugh at me for living like a Third World peasant, eating corn meal gruel and scrounging through the dump for something to recycle to China. But at least I'll still have power to my hut when the rest of you sit in the dark, unable to find your SUV car keys ( look, Obammy gave us a discount to buy this pant load, now it only cost half what my house did! ). But let's advance past the three day test. That only measures how well you can weather bad weather, see if you can get by with a short grid down. How about testing to see how you will live once you are homeless. Or, even just testing to see how you will live on only one income instead of two. You can do a lot by making lists and alternate budgets and having planning sessions. But you can't foresee what is going to come up unexpectedly unless you actually play it out in real world.
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If you own an RV ( or, rent one if you are thinking of buying ), how about taking it to the closest parking spot you won't be bothered in and live there a week. Go back and forth from there to work so you don't need to take a vacation. Don't cheat by taking extra propane tanks and having the freezer overflowing with steaks you can BBQ. Take hard to prepare meals that are also harder to clean up from such as rice and chili, perhaps even try to grind corn and beans. Try to use solar ovens instead of propane. Don't bring extra clothes, do your laundry there. You'll get a good idea of the bickering, the overuse of power and propane, the water waste, the inability to have sex with the kids three feet away ( not that you would get any anyway cause the wife is not going to like your idea of a vacation ). You'll find out how hard it is to get the kids to play the board game you brought after the TV antenna only picks up one channel, or it is raining all day or some idiot drains the batteries after playing video games all day.
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Since most of you married high maintenance princesses, you don't own an RV. They wouldn't be seen dead in a tin box. I know you still think you are getting a good deal, sex four times a month for all your paycheck, all of your free time and no friends allowed except on spouse approved Superbowl game day. I'm not judging, I was once there myself ( except I only got it twice a month so I was twice the fool ). How you are going to get her highness to try out this test in a car, van or tent escapes my imagination. You'll be lucky to try out the three day test. Perhaps if you are doubling up with friends in a regular house you can get by with this. Most of you most likely won't try, since that means giving up one if not two of your monthly allotted bootie calls. If you can't go anywhere ( but dear, we are paying a mortgage/rent. Why should we leave unless we are going on vacation in a hotel? ), at least try to extend the three day test to a week. I imagine it would be more realistic.
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I had game planned my grid escape for years. I had worked out as many details as I could. Remember, all of those books of mine on off grid living were written in a van parked in a driveway. I was practicing off grid, but I still had in town shopping and supply as a prop. When I moved miles out of town I still had an adjustment period where I learned new things and had to rethink others. I had lived in a van for five months. Prior to that I had lived in an RV for years without hot water. I thought I had experienced all I needed. But the first few weeks off grid and away from town was still a new learning experience. You will need to experience for yourself a reduced living arrangement. Otherwise you can't plan properly. Or, just ignore the impending collapse, because after all we are Americans and super special and won't repeat history and we can wallow in luxury forever and nothing bad will happen to our Yuppie reality.
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