REALITY AVOIDANCE
First off, way to go comments section! Some of those rants put me to shame. Glad to see I'm able to get the crap stew stirred up. Second, thank you Loyal Minion First Class Sam for the snail mail donation. Above and beyond the call of duty.
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Today I would like to talk about wishing I was still an alcoholic. Well, not wishing for waking up feeling like I was beaten and violated the night before, or having half a liver half way through life or having to sneak the root beer schnapps into soda cans at work because happy hour is really too far away. But the reality avoidance part of alcoholism. And I can't even indulge slightly, since I don't want to take any chance on repeating my lost decade ( I'm being dramatic- I had two hard core years of heavy drinking followed by a gradual step down until I stoped altogether in my late twenties ). It was about the time I quit assassinating brain cells that I started writing. Later that became a prime reality avoidance measure. When I say I must write to avoid insanity, that is what I refer to. I still supplement my fantasy forays into a post-apocalypse wasteland with some fiction books, movies and TV. I hate TV in that it seems to be worse than ever with rudely jerking you out of your coma with so many commercials. I'm vegetating here, shut up about 1-800-I'm-single-and-want-to-meet-a-huge-fat-chick ads. Or worse.
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I don't know how much is just me being whacked, how much is our general laziness from an energy rich industrial economy leading to the soft life, or if it is just the bread and circuses time we are moving through. It seems that alcohol has played quite a role throughout history as a numbing device, so perhaps we are just exercising the extra options available to us right now. Perhaps it is normal to try to escape into our happy place. I even wonder if this might not be a built in self destruct mechanism designed to limit our survival ability as overpopulation once again rears its ugly head. If we are hard wired to reproduce, perhaps we are also programmed to avoid thinking about that inevitable outcome. Leading more sheep to the slaughter to increase the survivors odds. Or maybe I'm just really over thinking the whole thing. Diarrhea of the brain.
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Why am I rambling on and on about my undeniably scary mental condition? You need to be careful how you handle reality avoidance. Having some escape, perhaps that is normal to reduce stress. Drinking, turning into a zombie in front of the TV. Kissing the dog and kicking the wife. Being a weekend adrenaline junkie. Whatever. But when you turn to a state of denial in order to avoid reality, then things turn problematic. Other than the whole teeth falling out issue and turning into a male prostitute ( and I ain't talking a Richard Gere type ) to support your habit danger, I almost think being on crack is healthier than living in denial. You are scared, you take some more crack. But you also get ready for the coming crap storm. With reality denial you make up happy thoughts in your head and so have nothing to fear. Don't worry, be happy. Heh, if I was toking up 24/7 you can believe I wouldn't be writing this. I would be a bum in Florida, scratching nits and eating out of the KFC dumpster. If they take me to jail for not paying the ex-wife, I wouldn't care because I was staying happy. I'd get my three hots and a cot. Of course, even that avoidance strategy isn't going to work much longer. With government budgets being squeezed I imagine non-violent offenders being turned over to for profit corporations that force you to work for restitution. You might think that is a great idea, but you can also bet that is where bankruptcy declaring folks are going to end up eventually. The Private Prison Inc. will charge you $20 a day in costs, actually spend $10 and pay you $3. You will never escape. And before you babble about it being un-Constitutional, remember what country you live in now. We are not the USA, but a wholly owned subsidiary of the Federal Reserve Bank. They do as they wish.
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Your happy thoughts are you being in denial. Face up to reality. And remember, no matter how darkly you envision the future it will most likely be far worse. I'm trying to be realistic and even I can't scratch the reality of our future dystopia. I'm taking the shiny gloss off our magic mirror of reality avoidance, but I haven't totally removed it for what is underneath. Perhaps even I can't totally face up to reality. And I enjoy this kind of crap. All hail Shiva!
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8 comments:
Thanks for the inspiring post James.I'm going to order the Do-It-Yourself Funeral Book right now!
"Face up to reality."
No! No! No! anything but that; besides with OBAMACARE and FREE government schools everybody knows things are just going to be fine for the children....
"And remember, no matter how darkly you envision the future it will most likely be far worse."
what can be worse than disco and the seventies ?
I was thinking of a book I was reading a while back called "Lucille and the XXX Road". Now before you get all hot and bothered its about two guys riding motorcycles around the world. They rode there bikes through Russia and they said just about everyone is drunk on vodka. The Russian citizen gets a weekly allotment of vodka. Talk about keeping the population docile.
I've spent a lot of time in Russia since the end of the Cold War. There is little to do there other than work hard, drink, screw, and beat up on each other. It's dark and cold most of the year....bipolar much? To their credit the Russians realize it and are a stoic and darkly humorous lot once you get to know them.
When I took up a section of my 1832 built barn floor lo and behold the end panel from a beer keg was there along with a few [empty]pint bottles of hooch. My bricklaying Mason friend tells me that around here it used to be a part of the hod carrier's job to keep the mason's stein full up at the end of the wall; caps on the old style steins kept the bugs and debris down as the mason worked his way to the refreshment. My lttle eight year old legs were sent on down to the local bar to get my uncle's beer bucket filled up to keep him working.
You want to keep MY old body working when it wants to lay down and take a nap--booze me up. If I don't feel the pain I can keep on moving. I read a serious academic paper by an anthropologist that claimed that beer was a vital part of getting civilisations rolling along. I'm like you tho; just can't do that anymore but your avoidence of pain observation is right on I believe.
I think the *reality avoidance* crowd just tries to buy their way out of the inevitable. Plasma tv's, SUVs. all the bells, whistles and trappings of the consumer society.
Of course the inevitable *crash* is upon us and the piper is demanding his pay...
I have never been much into drinking and I quit smoking years ago. However, if things get really bad, and I perceive there is no hope and I am in too much pain, I think I would take them up. There is only so much pain a guy or gal can take.
Normal people (and I do mean "Normal") block out a lot of negative thoughts based on Realitiy. We have to or we would go nuts. If we can no longer block out the thoughts about our very real dangers and the fact we all are going to die, we get so depressed that we cannot function. Tobacco and alcohol, however, are just temporary solutions, but is there any permanent solutions?
How about a blog on the importance of beer/brewing in primitive socity? The alcohol keeps the liquid drinkable, kills bugs and germs, and allows work despite painful joints. Not to mention taking perisable food and perserving it for future comsumption or trade. I remember something about western farmers converting hard to transport grain into easy to trade whisky (and the Feds response of excessive taxation/open warfare on those who tried to better themselfs at the risk of hurting the PTB's profits)
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